Uli, the angel of Westerham
This is a warning for every foreigner who dares to use the Deutsche Bahn as a means of
transportation. It can be hell! First of all you will notice that it is fucking expensive. Compared tot he
ticket price you will realize that the service is poor (if there’s any). But most of all the train
connections are horrible. It is very rarely that you will manage to catch your connections. This is the
story how a Bavarian taxi driver saved our lives.
No attendands in sight
Upon reaching the train station of Braunschweig on a Sunday midday I just have to take a look into
the face of my colleague to realize that something is already going wrong. Our first train is
announced to be late. Good start! Will we catch our connecting train at Halle. We are supposed to
ask the attendant on the train for help. Well, we would have loved to do so, however, nobody shows
up.
It is not soo bad, we have our DB-App on the mobile. Luckily enough there is another train going to
Munich. And thanks to the fact that we are late for half an hour we don’t really have to wait. Where
is the rub? Well, this train take a different route to Munich and thus needs more time to go there. I.e.
we will not catch our connection over there. Still that is not a problem. We learn that the surburban
railway we intended to take is not running due to construction works on the route. What now? We
take another look onto our App. Oh no, the information tells us that we have to take a train to
Rosenheim (which is located behind Westerham) first and then go back by train from there to
Westerham (no joke!).
Rosenheim, Aibling oder Salzburg?
Arriving at Munich we see that the rail track no. ten is already packed with people. Nice. A public
address announcement tells us that today’s train will have three different directions: one part goes
to Rosenheim, a second one to Aibling and a third one to Salzburg. I am sure that absolutely nobody
understood which wagon is the right one to take. We stopped caring and just step in. Once again the
trains leaves the station with a delay of 15 minutes. That means we will not catch the connection to
Westerham and thus have to wait for another hour at the trains station of Rosenheim.
At 21:40 we finally catch the train to Westerham. We started today at 12:30 Uhr in Braunschweig
and had so far joyful 9 hours on different trains. Half an hour later we arrive at our final destination:
Westerham. We are not the only lost souls that day. Another woman arrives after an odyssey from
Frankfurt to the Bavarian province. Completely overtired we arrive at the hotel and fall into bed.
Is it groundhog day?
Our return journey is on tuesday afternoon. Well at least we try. When the five of us arrive at the
little train station we are still hopeful that everything will work out fine. It won’t. The DB-App still tells
us that the train is on time, until … Well, until a colleague says that the train is cancelled. Well, at first
we think this is a hoax, just to test us. But it is not. The public announcement confirms it. We panic.
What can we do about it.
Okay, let’s just call a taxi to Munich. Yes, good idea. Let’s do it. No way. We call three different taxi
enterprises and everybody tells us that there are not going to collect us from Westerham. What?
Absolutely unbelievable. We call the meeting place, they refuse as well to help us. Another colleague
desperately storms the train station kiosk and aks the owner for help. The guy gives ear to us and
calls a friend who works with a taxi company. The first try is not successful, but a second call brings
the commitment. A driver will arrive in about half an hour. Oh, we might run short. Our train leaves
Munich at 14.56 p.m. and the taxi driver will not pick us up before two o’clock. Our panickness is
almost hysterical. Everybody wants to get home – somehow. Then comes Uli. That’s the name oft he
taxi driver and out angel today. He is not only calm and does not only emanate Bavarian coziness. He
is moreover sure that we will make it.
Four ladies on a backseat
Our luggage is almost to big for the trunk. The backseat however is definitely to small for four ladies.
That means one of them has to sit on a lap. Is that legal? There is no time for such considerations. We
just go. We take the „Autobahn“ to the city limits. Than comes the hardest part: the drive through
the city. Time is shorter and shorter. We pass by some police cars. Will they stop us? Uli does not
care, he drives on. It is 14:50 Uhr. We almost gave up when Uli plucks up his courage and delivers us
two minutes later right in front of the train station. We grab our luggage and reach the train with our
last ounce of strength
Track construction
You might guess it already: there is more inconvenience ahead of us. Five minutes later we are stuck
on the main track for some construction. We can’t help it but laugh. Once more we will not catch our
connection. We pull out the DB-App. There is a train at Leipzig that will bring us nonstop to
Braunschweig. We are running out of time again. We arrive at Leipzig with a delay of 23 minutes. We
take our suitcases and run to track 15. We are really pissed off but make it. And finally we arrive
punctually at our final destination. I refuse to envision what would have happened if we missed the
train from Leipzig. The alternative would have been a train via Vienenburg (which is in the Harz
Mountains) to Braunschweig.
Well folks, be warned: take the Deutsche Bahn can be a nightmare unless you come across Uli, the
angel of Westerham.
